It was a big month for new short takes. I can’t really get through a day without watching a film — usually a horror film. But as usual, I’m going to have to look up half the films here. It was only after writing two articles about Monster From The Ocean Floor that I remembered what it was about.

This doesn’t speak to the quality of the films. But it does speak to the quality of the titles. Like The Beast Must Die. That could be about anything!

1. 13 Frightened Girls (1963): probably my least favorite William Castle film. But then, I’m not that target audience of 13-year-old girls. It’s well-made, though.
2. 13 Ghosts (1960): a light horror mystery from our man Castle. This is a good one to get your kids started on horror films.
3. And Now the Screaming Starts! (1973): one of the better Amicus features. Very effective!
4. Asylum (1972): another collection of short horror films from Amicus. I particularly like the one about the chopped-up lady.
5. The Babysitter (1980): made-for-television film about an unstable nanny who destroys a family. Features William Shatner in a regular-guy role.
6. Beast From Haunted Cave (1959): a standard low-budget monster movie about a group of criminals on the run. Notable mostly for taking place in the snow.
7. The Beast Must Die (1974): this is the kind of film that psychotronic fans live for. Who would think to combine a werewolf with an insane big game hunter? You’ve got to see this!
8. Black Christmas (1974): one of the earliest slasher films and one of the best. It’s really nice to have a story that doesn’t feature any kind of clever back-story. There’s a crazy guy and he’s murdering people. That’s enough.
9. Blood Ties (1991): a new take on the vampire. Unfortunately, this has been done to death now. But if you can get past that, it’s a solid film.
10. BMX Bandits (1983): a bike-oriented kids film that made Nicole Kidman a star. If you were into those bikes when you were a kid, you’ll love this film. I, of course, was inside watching horror films.
11. Captain Kronos – Vampire Hunter (1974): if released today, this title would be cheeky. But this film is for real. It’s a wonderful combination of horror and adventure. This is a classic!
12. Chop (2011): a truly funny horror comedy that surprises right up to its denouement, which is purposefully anti-climatic. I love this film!
13. Countess Dracula (1971): horror film based on the true-life psychopath Elizabeth Báthory. Other than actually getting younger, this is probably how it was.
14. Day of Anger (1967): a good Spaghetti Western that maybe tries a bit too hard to be serious.
15. Day the World Ended (1955): another of those 1950s post-nuclear war films that mostly take place in a single room. This one is pretty good.
16. Death Smiles on a Murderer (1973): basically a period zombie picture that is pretty twisted.
17. Doll Factory (2014): a teen horror-comedy that is genuinely funny. And most of the teens are horrible so it’s fun to see them eaten by dolls.
18. Escape from LA (1996): people hated this film when it came out but today, it’s probably more fun to watch than the original.
19. Escape from New York (1981): a solid action film although I don’t especially care. I’ve never gotten over Adrienne Barbeau dying.
20. The Evil (1978): people renovating an old house unleash a demon and need to find their way out. The set is great and the film a lot better than it has any right to be.
21. Forest Primeval (2008): a lesser film by the Polonia brothers, it’s a bit slow but definitely has its moments.
22. Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster (1965): a pleasant 1960s Scifi film about Martians stealing our women. Nothing to be sought or avoided.
23. God’s Gun (1976): a great Spaghetti Western with Lee Van Cleef playing two roles. It’s a lot of fun.
24. Homicidal (1961): one of William Castle’s best. I think it’s better than Psycho.
25. House of the Long Shadows (1983): the only film featuring Vincent Price, Peter Cushing, Christopher Lee, and John Carradine. Even apart from that, it’s a good film.
26. Inferno (1980): The second film in The Three Mothers trilogy. Very creepy with great practical effects and look. Essential viewing!
27. The Kentucky Fried Movie (1977): great sketch comedy featuring four segments that should appeal to psychotronic fans.
28. Krippendorf’s Tribe (1998): a widely-hated but hilarious screenball comedy.
29. The Little Shop of Horrors (1960): this is a very funny film. If you haven’t seen it, what’s wrong? Here: a free copy!
30. Mandao of the Dead (2018): a youthful comedy with a horror angle. I’m really looking forward to what this group does in the future.
31. Monster From The Ocean Floor (1954): Roger Corman’s first film is pretty good. And the shark scene is great.
32. Mother of Tears (2007): the last of The Three Mothers trilogy. It features great practical horror effects. Don’t believe the haters.
33. Mr Sardonicus (1961): this is a really good film but the make-up effects do make it seem kind of silly.
34. The Norliss Tapes (1973): the pilot of what looks like what would have been a great series. It features an unusual zombie story.
35. The Old Dark House (1963): William Castle’s remake is quite enjoyable. This is another one for the kids.
36. Paranoiac (1963): story of a very screwed-up family. Solid narrative.
37. Phantom of the Paradise (1974): a surprisingly good musical and parody of Faust and Phantom of the Opera.
38. A Pistol for Ringo (1965): a very good Spaghetti Western that spawned a ton of sequels.
39. Rats: Night of Terror (1984): Two hundred years after nuclear war, rats have become very dangerous. Pretty fun film.
40. Seven Psychopaths (2012): a fun but intense film about a bunch of really bad people. You know they have to be bad if Colin Farrell is the most likable character.
41. Shanghai Joe (1973): more or less a film version of Kung Fu with over-the-top action sequences.
42. Schlep (2016): teen comedy from the same group that brought us Mandao of the Dead.
43. Serpent Island (1954): low-budget film aboard a ship on its way to Haiti. It’s surprisingly engaging.
44. Support Your Local Gunfighter (1971): solid comedy with great production values. Most people like the original more.
45. Support Your Local Sheriff (1969): simple comedy with a strong lead performance and a great supporting cast.
46. Terror of Dracula (2012): a low-budget and very talky Dracula adaptation. Good acting.

That’s all for this month. I’ll probably focus more on horror next month.

I’d say the following are worth owning: The Beast Must Die, Black Christmas, Captain Kronos – Vampire Hunter, Chop, Doll Factory, Escape from LA, Escape from New York, Homicidal, Inferno, The Kentucky Fried Movie, A Pistol for Ringo, And Now the Screaming Starts! The rest are either of less interest or are only marginally psychotronic.

Also: just download The Little Shop of Horrors since it is free and something you’ll want to watch every few years.

Yesterday, 26 May, was Peter Cushing’s birthday. He was born in 1913.

And today, 27 May, is the birthday of Vincent Price (1911) and Christopher Lee (1922).

Three titans of horror. Three excellent actors. Three tall men. All born around the same date.

I guess they were also all friends, although it’s very hard to tell when it comes to actors who are always playing a part when a camera is rolling.

Collaborations

Everyone knows that Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing starred in a lot of films together. Watching a collection of Hammer films is a lot like watching “The Cushing and Lee Show. “

I know of only two films that featured Price and Cushing. The first was Dr Phibes Rises Again although Cushing is barely in it and probably wasn’t even on set at the same time as Price. Much better is Madhouse where they work together closely and brilliantly. It’s a great part for Cushing!

And there’s only one film I know of with just Price and Lee: The Oblong Box. It’s a great film but the two men don’t work that much with each other.

All Three Men

There are two films that feature all three men. The first was 1970’s Scream and Scream Again. It’s a good film that has you confused until the very end. The problem with it is that Peter Cushing is hardly in it all.

If you want to celebrate this occasion, you should watch House of the Long Shadows. It’s an ensemble film but the three men are all primary. And as a special extra it also features John Carradine!

And I just happened to have found a wonderful copy of the film on YouTube. So here’s to Peter Cushing, Vincent Price, and Christopher Lee!

Image from House Of The Long Shadows via Amazon under Fair Use.

On this day, 10 May, in 1966, For a Few Dollars More was released in the US.

It was the follow-up to A Fistful of Dollars. At one time, I liked it better but I eventually realized that was only because I enjoyed seeing Lee Van Cleef as a good guy.

But in the long run, I don’t like it all that much. The flashback scenes of Indio and Mortimer’s sister are prime examples of Sergio Leone at his worst.

Also, the plot is a mess with Indo being both unbelievably smart and stupid.

But if you haven’t seen the film, you definitely should. It’s nice just to hang out with Van Cleef and Clint Eastwood for a couple of hours. And there are a number of comedic elements like the old man who refused to sell his property to the railroad and the hat-shooting scene.

Mothra

On this day in 1962, Mothra was released in the US.

Okay, so it isn’t a serious film like Godzilla. But it’s much more fanciful — like a Ray Harryhausen film.

Dead Man

On this day in 1996, Jim Jarmusch’s Dead Man was put into general release. When I first saw it, I didn’t enjoy it that much. I was expecting a traditional narrative. Over time, my love of the film has only increased.

It’s both deep and deeply twisted. I never lose my appreciation for Lance Henriksen’s eating Michael Wincott’s hand. That should be enough to get you to watch it.

Thunder Road

On this day in 1958, Thunder Road was released. It’s hard not to like Robert Mitchum. And here he is as a bootleg transporter so we get lots of car chases and bravado.

The formula has been copied many times but this zippy little feature is a must-see for psychotronic fans.

For a Few Dollars More poster via Wikipedia under Fair use.

When I first got into low-budget movies, I figured that despite all their other faults, they would at least have strong screenplays because that’s one thing you could get right without cost. Boy was I naive! Also: on this day, 29 April, in 2005, the big-budget cinematic version of Douglas Adams’ book was released, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

It seems that what it takes to sit in your room for months crafting a screenplay is not what it takes to get a film made. That means that a lot of films go into production with poor scripts. And thank God for that! I’d rather have the films than see young would-be filmmakers die alone in their rooms for lack of Vitamin D.

Why Hitchhiker Is Just Fine

And that brings me to The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. The screenplay isn’t bad. And the film was fine. It worked well enough. And that seems to be what everyone else thought. No one demanded their money or time back. Most two-hour periods are worse than the two hours I spent with it.

But given all the talent and creativity that went into the film, why was it just fine? I think the answer to this is simple: the source material wasn’t that great.

I’ll admit: I came to The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy late — a couple of years after all my nerdy friends were raving about it. And I did not get it. I could see that it was meant to be funny. But it was filled with the kinds of jokes that people with poor senses of humor find hysterical.

My theory is that no one ever found the books funny. Instead, they thought them “clever” and thought they would like to be the kind of people who they suspected would find such things funny.

So 15 years ago today we got this film. And it’s fine. It really is. I wouldn’t mind watching it again.

But you know what I can’t take? Good Omens. I got about five minutes into it and I realized they were doing that same kind of comedy and I stopped. And that seems to be the ultimate legacy of Douglas Adams: that kind of comedy where just in case the jokes don’t work the teller is going to do it really intensely.

But the movie? Fine.

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy poster via Wikipedia under Fair Use.

On this day, 28 April, back in 1930, the actor Carolyn Jones was born. She will always be remembered as Morticia in the television series The Addams Family.

When I was a kid, I much preferred The Munsters. But as I got older, I turned away from it and toward The Addams Family. The comedy is much more arch.

What seems weird now is that I remember these shows being huge. But they both ended after two seasons. Even in their first seasons, they both were roughly the twentieth most popular shows — good but not astounding. And in their second seasons, The Munsters was destroyed by Batman and The Addams Family by Hogan’s Heroes.

Still, the shows are great. I watched the entire first season a couple of months ago and it holds up really well.

Carolyn Jones had a good career outside The Addams Family. She had notable parts in classics like William Castle’s The Saracen Blade, Don Siegel’s Invasion of the Body Snatchers, and Tobe Hooper’s Eaten Alive.

Sadly, Jones developed colon cancer and died at the age of 53.

Also Today

A few notable films were released on this date. The Horror Show came out in 1989. The documentary Crumb came out in 1995, the experimental Timecode in 2000, and the surprisingly good comedy The TV Set in 2006.

Carolyn Jones and John Astin by ABC Television via Wikipedia. It is in the Public Domain.

In 2000, Miss Congeniality was released. It is mostly a love letter to beauty pageants even if it also lampoons them. But it was not, however, released on this date. It was released on 22 December.

But you see, I had a problem. I’ve complained about it before. It’s really hard to do these anniversary posts. And today, I had no films released and the only person who was even close to being worth focusing on was Paul Mazursky (Down and Out in Beverly Hills).

In the film Miss Congeniality, Miss Rhode Island is asked to describe her perfect date. She then says, “That’s a tough one. I’d have to say April 25th because it’s not too hot and not too cold. All you need is a light jacket.”

Sympathy for the Contestant

These kinds of screw-ups are not that uncommon. In fact, this one probably really happened. But I feel sorry for the contestants. It’s all so fake and the questions are out of context. Given that the pageants are all about sex but pretend that it is nothing about sex, it isn’t surprising that a contestant would misinterpret the question.

And it’s not like asking someone their favorite day of the year is any more ridiculous than the rest of the questions they have to answer.

But the line is very funny. And it sets up a great joke later when Rhode Island tells the other contestants what she would have said, “My idea of a perfect date would be a man who takes me to a romantic dinner, and then we walk along the beach barefoot discussing books and music and movies.”

To this, New York says, “No wonder you’re still a virgin.”

Miss Congeniality poster via Wikipedia under Fair use.